I’m thinking to myself…”This sucks”, as I have been pretty spoiled when it comes to “work”. I have mostly worked for myself, and prefer to keep it that way. But, the work I was doing….well….lets just say “commission only” isn’t working out.
And NOW, of all times to have to look for work, it is just brutal…….the economy is on a nose dive to hell, and guess what? There aren’t any jobs! (wait….I take that back….I could work at McDonalds….or somewhere like that…..I’d rather gag myself).
To begin, I have a real problem with the whole application process. I am not joking, when I tell you I had to complete four online tests to see if I met the minimum requirements for knowledge regarding software, grammar, math, and a psychological evaluation. And this was just the beginning! Then, I had to go to an interview, which it wasn’t really an interview, mostly to turn in all the paperwork I had to bring, such as seven years…..yes seven….of W2’s of my past earnings. Oh yeah, this is just the beginning of the “process”, there is a background check, and of course to top it….a drug screen test! Lucky me!
One time, after completing a “personality evaluation”, it immediately told me, “The answers show us you are not a good fit for this position”. It then went on to tell me, I should not apply for any other positions there until after six months. I was answering these questions truthfully, so after that incident, I changed my strategy to answer according to what I believed they wanted for an answer.
Tomorrow I go to get my drug screen test, and I just spoke with my sister, and she told me, “Don’t eat any poppy seed muffins before you go…..that will show up as a positive.” Is it true? Eating poppy seed muffins will cause one to fail their drug test? Anyone know? Since I’m on the subject, if anyone knows of any other tips that I need to know about….please do share it with me.
I can’t go into details of the other seven pages of online “stuff” I had to fill out…such as “contract agreement”, “authorization for background check”, etc. I mean it is a two or three day ordeal….just filling out paperwork (and you don’t know if you actually get the job, until AFTER these verifications are completed).
I can’t help but think to myself, “I can thank all the former criminals and liars for all this paperwork I have to do now….just for a job”.
So, I’m handing over my life history, all in good faith that they aren’t going to steal my identity, or lose one of those many W-2 forms I gave them (all with my social on them too). I’m thinking to myself, “This better be worth it”, or I just wasted three days of my life.
Whatever happened to just filling out a one page application and shaking hands over the deal? I miss the good old days when applying for a job was simple.